Letters to Eridan
by EmoChickThatLooksLikePein
Summary: Send letters to the lovely Eridan Ampora  Because, seriously, he's desperate for...well..everything. NOW SEND ME SOME MAIL, BRO.
1. Chapter 1

**THIS WAS MADE BECAUSE I WANTED TOO AND MY FRIEND MADE AN ASK TAVROS!**

**SO NYYYEEEEH~**

**DON'T OWN, BELONGS TO HUSSIE!**

* * *

><p>Hi, this is Eridan Ampora, an I am acceptin letters.<p>

So send me some lovve mail~ -blowws kiss-

AN I DON'T WWANT HATE, OKAY!

Anywway, send awway~ I'll accept all of it~


	2. L4DRULEZ900 1

_I DON NOT OWN, KAYZ?  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>L4DRULEZ900<em>

_Hi Eridan~_

_Yes! It's me! Raven Nightcrest! I hope you remember me! I'm turning 15_  
><em>tomorrow so I wanted you to sing me a happy birthday song!<em>

_NOW! DOWN TO BUISNESS! I heard that you almost got trapped in your own scarf!_  
><em>Pffft! Come on man...That's just sad! <em>

_So...What was your reaction when you found out about all the fangirls shipping_  
><em>you and Sollux together? Tell me your reaction!<em>

_Sincerely,_

_Raven Nightcrest!_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Ravv,

Ah...yes. I remember you... It's nice to see you again.

Happy birthday sang? Okay... *clears throat*

*in sexy singing voice*

Happy wwrigglin day to youuu~ Happy wwrigglin day to yoouuuu~ Happy wwrigglin day dear Ravv, happy wwriggling day to you!

That sounded wwounderful! *praises self*

I did not! That is just an nasty rumor started by Kar! I can't get out of my scarf ju- *gets tangled in scarf* OH COD, SOMEONE HELP!

*finally gets out after twenty minutes*

M-me and Sollux..? *thinks*

...*epic nose bleed*

Ww-wwell, I s-should go...I need a showwer...

Ta ta,

Eridan Ampora.


	3. KeepingSecrets110 1

_I DON NOT OWN, BRO.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>KeepingSecrets110:<em>

_Hello Eridan! _

_My name is Shell Hirami! And I love you ever so much, you cute fishy hipster_  
><em>you! :D<em>

_Say! I heard you like Sollux! Would you rather be his kismesis or matesprit?_  
><em>Hmmmmmm? I'd love to know!<em>

_With love,_

_Shell Hirami_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Shell Hirami,

Thanks for the lovve~ *blowws kiss*

I-I, um...T-that's a...vvery good question... I-I..um...uh...m-maybe matesprit...o-or...I-I don't knoww... *blushes intensely*

Wwith...lovve...

Eridan Ampora.


	4. Emi 1

_I DON NOT OWN, BRO. I WISH I DID.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Emi:<em>

_How are you on this fine day? _

_Fill any quadrants yet?_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Emi,

I am vvery fine, thank you~ Although, I havve been asked about Sol ...a lot... *blush*

Quadrents...? *eyes start watering* NOOOOO! *cries* WWHY DOES NO ONE LOVVE ME? WWHY? AM I TOO BEAUTIFUL? *cries more*

WWHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS TO MEEEE? *sulks*

Yours,

Eridan Ampora...the love less...

*cries in corner*


	5. twinArmageddons 1

_I DON NOT OWN, BRO. I WISH I DID. YEAH. SIGH.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>twinArmageddons:<em>

_Dear fii2hbreath,_

_thii2 ii2 2o **iing 2tupiid but, ii've been denyiing thii2 for a_  
><em>whiile...2hiit ii might a2 well 2ay iit though. Iim **iing flu2hed for you.<em>

_Love,_

_JUST KIDDING ITS KARKAT, DOUCHEBAG._

**BLUBBLUBBLUB_  
><em>**

Dear...

*reads wwhole letter*

...

...

...

WWHAT THE HELL KAR?

WWHY WWOULD YOU DO THIS?

OH MY COD I HATE YOU!

*sulks in corner*

Stupid land dwwellers...

*cries slightly*


	6. kballkdball 1

_I DON'T FREAKING OWN THIS, KAY BRO? KAY?  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>dear Ampora,<em>

_you're much too ** beautiful. may the world tremble before your beautiosity_  
><em>one day, love.<em>

_..._

_jk. ^^ but, you are beautiful..._

_you plan on STAYING beautiful, right, love?_

_everyone's beloved Seer,_

_Kathryn ^^ 83_

_(also known as, the indisputable Kat. ^^)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Kat,

Wwhy thank you~*eyebrow wiggle* I am quite beautiful...

Jk? ...Oh...

I am still making the wworld tremble from my good looks.

I will stay beutiful~ For you of coarse~ *flirty wink*

From the** Beautiful,**

Eridan Ampora

(AN: Now look what you've gone and done! You've made him even MORE vain! ...I didn't even know that was possible...)


	7. Wolf Ness 1

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Hey Eridan,<em>

_I'm surprised you're actually taking letters from us "land dwellers" you hate_  
><em>so much. Just what's up with that? Wait this wasn't supposed to be about your<em>  
><em>attempts at genocide so don't answer that!<em>

_What I meant to ask was, what's your current relationship status with your_  
><em>troll buddies? (Karkat, Feferi, ALL OF THEM)<em>

_Signed,_

_Wolf Ness_

__**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Wwolf Ness,

Wwell, Tavv convinced me to do these... An I've begun to tolerate you all. I don't love, I TOLERATE.

My...relationships? Okay...

Well, first off...

Karkat:...I still hate him.

Aradia: Don't care about her...

Tavvros:...Wwe're...Bros...*awkward smile*

Sollux:...*blush*

Nepeta:...I ... no comment.

Kanaya: She's...okay... *visions a chainsawws dance through head* OH NO! NO I HATE HER! AAACCKKK!

Terezi: ...Okay...I guess...

Vvriska: ...No...just...No.

Equius:...He's...nice...an swweaty.

Gamzee: A complete an utter idiot.

Feferari:...*sobs in corner* FEEEEFFF ...FEEEEFFFFF!

*dries eyes*

Any wway...

From,

Eridan Ampora.


	8. kballkdball 2

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>dear Ampora,<em>

_83 glad to add to your unsurmountable vanity. MUA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA._

_YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL. EVERY LITTLE PIECE, LOVE. AND DON'T YOU KNOW? YOU'RE REALLY_  
><em>GONNA BE SOME-<em>

_** it. i'm gonig to sleep._

_love,_

_Kat. 83_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Kat,

Vvanity, what vanity? I have no vvanity. *huff*

_**BLATANT LIE**_

...

Thank you for those marvvelous complements~

Sleep wwell,

Eridan Ampora


	9. Icecestro Zviera Xi 1

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Lord Ampora,<em>

_Have you ever considered serenading Feferi through song to show how you feel?_  
><em>If so, what song would it be? My guess is a dark love song.<em>

_Be sure to tell me its results!_

_Sincerely,_

_Icecestro Zviera Xi_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Ice,

Yes, I have...

*broods*

It was a song I heard on your 'Eurovvision'.

Fairytail by Alexander Rybeck, i think wwas his name...

...It failed...

Miserably...

*sulks in corner*

Yours...

Eridan Ampora


	10. L4DRULEZ900 2

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Hi Eridan~<em>

_Thank you very much~! I am now old enough to be your kisnesis! Well...That's_  
><em>what Gamzee said when he came over yesterday...<em>

_*grabs the scarf and tugs* See~? Sometimes I think your so stupid~! *pats_  
><em>head*<em>

_My reaction exactly. _

_So! Have your ever tried brownies? Will they make you sick? Will they poison_  
><em>you? Hmmmm?<em>

_Write back to me~!_

_Raven Nightcrest!_

**BLUBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Ravv,

Your wwelcome. Kisnesis? Really...*grins a sharky grin* Only if you wwant~

Gamzee? ... Hmm...

Gack! Don't choke me! I need my neck! *swwats hand* Don't pap me like I'm a lowwblood. *pout*

Wwell...*blush*

I'm not sure wwhat the hell you are talkin about. I can eat a 'browwnie'.

I havve wwriten you,

Eridan Ampora.


	11. ArtemiS CaptoR 1

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em> WitcH OF BlooD:<em>

_DeaR EridaN,_

_HellO! I'M ArtemiS, Sollux'S TwiN SisteR! I HearD ThaT YoU HavE FlusheD_  
><em>FeelingS FoR MY LittlE BrotheR(IM ThE OldeR TwiN) IS ThaT TruE? NoT ThaT I<em>  
><em>MinD, SoL NeedS SomeonE OtheR ThaN ME TO BE ArounD...NicE TO FinallY WritE<em>  
><em>YoU!<em>

_ArtemiS CaptoR (ThE WitcH OF BlooD)_

__**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Art,

Hello to you as wwell. Sol has a sister? He never told me that...

F-flushed? Ww-wwell, I, um...

...Maybe. *blushes, and hides face in pilloww*

It wwas nice writin as wwell,

Eridan Ampora (Prince of Hope)


	12. Wolf Ness 2

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Hi Eridan, <em>

_You don't have to love us. Because I'm sure as ** that I don't love you. _

_Judging from your reaction and the purple stains on the paper, Feferi must be_  
><em>a ... touchy subject. But speaking of touchy subjects I'm rather<em>  
><em>curious...Sollux or Feferi. You have to pick onr or just respond that you<em>  
><em>can't decide. And whatever your answer is, tell my WHY it is what it is. <em>

_-Wolf Ness_

__**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

****Dear Wwol,

...Thanks for the flattery...

Choose...?

I, um...

*thinks dramatically, as the wwind blowws lightly, rufflin his cape an hair*

I-I havve to go wwith...

...Sol...*blush*

I-I like Sol...because...he treats me differently, he's vvery cute, ...an...*blushes purple* he's so swweet an nice...an he's good wwith computers an *starts going on about all the thing Sol is*

Goodbye,

Eridan Ampora


	13. Aya 1

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Ayase:<em>

_If you take Sollux away from Feferi I will never forgive you!_

**BLUBBLUBBLUb**

**__**Dear Aya,

I can do wwhatevva I wwant.

So,

NYEH.

Ha ha,

Eridan Ampora


	14. L4NDRULEZ900 3

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Eridannnn~<em>

_Okay! I'll be your kisnesis! *smiles shyly* Yay~!_

_Yeah...Pretty cool dude~_

_Aww...But you're so adorable! *tries to pat head again*_

_D'awww...Your blushing!_

_Just askin...Cuz I made a whole bunch of them! I tried to give some to Karkat,_  
><em>but he poked my forehead and walked off. Man I really hate him! *pout!*<em>

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Ravv,

*sharkey pervv grin* 'Yay' indeed~

*scoffs* Yeah, 'cool'. *rolls eyes*

*smacks hand* Don't mess my hair! Do you knoww howw long it takes to do it? Believe it or not, I do not wwake up wwith this beautiful hair. *puts nose in air snoodily*

*blushes more* S-stop it!

Kar is...a idiot... Noww, wwhat are these 'browwnies' you speak of?

Good day,

Eridan Ampora


	15. ArtemiS CaptoR 2

_NO OOOWWWNNNN BELONG TO HUSSIEEEEEEE.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>WitcH OF BlooD:<em>

_DeaR ErI,_

_YeP. I'vE BeeN...AwaY FoR SomE TimE SO I CaN SeE WhY MY BrotheR Wouldn'T TalK_  
><em>AbouT ME MucH. <em>

_I'M ThE MorE ArtistiC, CreativE TwiN, SO Art'S A PrettY DamN GooD NicknamE :)_  
><em>:)<em>

_AwwwwwW NO NeeD TO BE ShY AbouT IT! YoU SeeM LikE A GooD MatcH FoR SoL. BuT_  
><em>JusT Know I'M StilL HiS BiG SisteR AnD IF YoU MakE OnE WronG Move, I WilL ShoW<em>  
><em>YoU JusT HoW GooD I AM WitH A DaggeR :] :]<em>

_NoW It'S TimE FoR ME TO PlaY MatchmakeR~ ;) ;)_

_ThE WitcH OF BlooD,_

_ArtemiS CaptoR_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Art,

Ah, I get it. So wwhere exactly did you go?

It's just something I do. You know.

D-dagger...? *pales* ...An I'm not shy about it! *huff/pout*

Matchmaker? Wwhat the hell do you mean 'Matchmaker'?

The Price of Hope,

Eridan Ampora


	16. Chapter 16 Twindemigod

_Srry it has taken so long._

_Also, no more anonymous. Srry, but I got trolled on one story._

_Stupid trolls..._

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Eridan,<em>

_I know you most likely HATE letters from humans and stuff well I am not  
>entirely human.<em>

_BLah BLah Blah. So Me and my friend where talking about you and well frankly  
>she thinks I want to be your blackrom. So just to make Derpy happy would you<br>atleast pretend to be my 'kismesis' or what ever you trolls call it._

_And dude I am sure someone somewhere loves you hehehe._

_Twindemigod (Gemini Diamond)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Twi,

Got that right...Wwait a minute...

Not entirely?

Hmmm...Yes. *eyebroww wwiggle*

REAAAALLLLYY? *sparkly eyes*

Signed,

Eridan Ampora

(Prince of Hope)


	17. Chapter 17 ILGAM

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Eridan,<em>

_I WANT SOLLUX TO MAKE YOU PREGNANT._

_Your fellow aquarian, EridanxSollux, GrellxSebastian, AloisxCiel,_  
><em>GamzeexTavros, KaitoxMiku, LenxRin, Michael Jackson, Lady Gaga, and<em>  
><em>JohnxKarkat fan,<em>

_-ILGAM 3_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear ILGAM 3

...

WWHAT THE FUCKIN HELL?

WWHO IS THIS?

I DEMAND YOU TELL ME!

(Translation: WWhy am I the bottom? *tear*)

WWTF,

Eridan Ampora


	18. Chapter 18 ArtemiS CaptoR 3

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Eridan,<em>

_WitcH OF BlooD:DeaR ErI,_

_AH, ItS A LonG StorY...*SighS AnD RunS HanD ThrougH HaiR* MY EmotionS Weren'T_  
><em>ExactlY...IN ChecK AnD IT StarteD TO AffecT MY, AnD EveN Sollux'S PsiioniicS.<em>  
><em>I HaD A TendencY TO...LosE ControL OF MY PowerS. SoL AnD I DecideD IT WoulD BE<em>  
><em>BesT FoR ME TO LeavE AnD CalM DowN. I JusT GoT BacK. IT TooK A FeW SweepS BuT<em>  
><em>I'M FinE NoW.<em>

_That'S ActuallY WhY I UsE DaggerS (TwiN DaggerS TO BE ExacT :D :D) I FeeL_  
><em>BetteR WitH TheM ThaN MY UnpredictablE PsiioniicS, YoU KnoW WhaT I MeaN?<em>

_Don'T WorrY, I Won'T HurT YoU UnlesS YoU HurT HiM. RighT, NoT AT AlL. BY ThE_  
><em>AncestorS You'rE AS StubborN AS SoL Too.<em>

_A MatchmakeR IS SomeonE WhO SetS UP PeoplE ArounD Them IN ThE ReD QuadrentS_  
><em>AnD TrY TO GeT TheM OuT OF BlacK QuadrentS. I LovE MatchmakinG AnD SeeinG MY<em>  
><em>FiendS (AnD SiblingS) HappY :) :)<em>

_WoW ThiS WaS A LonG LetteR XD XD_

_ThE WitcH OF BlooD,_

_ArtemiS CaptoR_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Art,

Wwoww...

Um...yeah...I...guess...*slowwly edges away*

I'm not stubborn! *hmms*

O...okay... That's kinda wwhat Nep does...right?

Not that long...

Prince of hope,

Eridan Ampora


	19. Chapter 19 Wolf Ness3

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Eridan,<em>

_Wol? Is that some kind of nickname? Yay! :D_

_Damn Eridan you've got it bad for Sol. I suck at romance, I've got no tips on_  
><em>ow you'd woo him. But you can start by being nice and see how that works :)<em>

_Just curious, what do you like to do on your spare time?_

_-Wolf Ness_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Wol,

Just somethin I do.

Really? Hmm...I guess that wwould wwork...

This. I also stal- um, hang out wwith a feww of the others...

From,

Eridan Ampora :D

(Author side not: I just realized your name is like Katniss. From Huger Games. Yay. :D)


	20. Chapter 20 L4NDRULEZ900 4

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Eridannnnn~<em>

_Stop looking so pervy! It makes me feel nervous! *blushes*_

_Why're you scoffing? I thought you and Gamz Gamz were cool!_

_Well excuse me sleeping beauty. That's why I don't bother with my hair. I just_  
><em>brush it once or twice in the morning and I'm ready to go~!<em>

_Well fine~! But at least now if someone asks you if you've ever filled a_  
><em>quadrant, you can say you have! So can I!<em>

_I know he is. Oh! It's something us humans eat on earth. It's made with_  
><em>chocolate and inside it's fluffy. Not like cat fluffy, like...UGH! I can't<em>  
><em>even explain it! I'll just bring some over tomorrow.<em>

_With love and bucke-I MEAN BROWNIES,_

_Raven Nightcrest~_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Ravv,

*more perv looks, lol*

Wwe're...okay...

Hmmp! Wwell, it take forevver to do _this _masterpiece.

*realization* YOUR RIGHT! *eye sparkle*

Hmm...I wwill try these browwnies.

Um...,

Eridan Ampora


	21. Chapter 21 tagLE dEkart 1

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Erida^ ampora,<em>

_Hi. my ^ame is ta^gLE, a^d i don't tHi^k wE'vE EvEr mEt._

_ELE^ik is aLways tELLi^g mE to stay away from othEr HigHbLoods. He says_  
><em>"tHEy'rE ^ot aLL as ^ice as mE."<em>

_but i mEan, rigHti^g you couLd'^t Hurt, rigHt?_

_i actuaLLy wantEd to ask your advicE about Him. wE'rE rEaLLy cLosE a^d HE_  
><em>caLLs mE His moiraiL but i fEEL morE rEd tHa^ tHat. How do i tELL Him?<em>

_aLso, wHy do somE HigHbLoods LivE i^ thE sEa? it does^'t makE sEnsE to mE._

_rEgards,_

_ta^gLE dEkart_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Tan,

I'm sure wwe havven't...

Wwell...Tell him that wwe can be nice...to other highbloods.

Wwriting me nevver hurts!

Wwellllllll...Givve him a bucket! It hasn't wworked for ME yet...But It wwill someday!

From,

Eridan Ampora


	22. Chapter 22 Kagesempai 1

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Kage-no-Akuma<em>

_Yo, name's above but you can call me Kage, Kage-chan, Kage-san, Shadow or_  
><em>Scarlet.<em>

_Now down to the buisness~ What are your thoughts on...Sollux...?_

_DUM_

_DUM_

_DUM!_

_XD Cod that was overdramatic._

_0.0 Now seriously..._

_TELL ME!_

_Oh, here you can have this cat drawing..._

_...／l、_

_（ﾟ､ ｡ ７_

_l、 ~ヽ_

_じしf, )ノ Mew~_

_With Canada and Russia (Kolkolkol~ ^J^ Become one with Russia, da?)_

_Kage-no-Akuma(Name shall be changed when you pick one...)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear ...Kag,

I havve a name for you. So, nyeh.

S-sol? Wwel...

um...

I may havve...

-whisper- Red feelins for him...

*blush*

Thank you for...the...paww beast...

No. I wwill not 'become one'. I LEARNED FROM THE LAST TIME. *shivvers*

Signed,

Eridan Ampora


	23. Chapter 23 Mew Mew Panda 1

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Heeeyyyy Eridaaannn~<em>

_ I'm a hipster,too! So you're not alone :D! Though that's kinda funny considering Kanaya being my patron troll...a-anywway(lol I copied you)I was just wondering if I could,could I be your moirail? You seem pretty cool :D! *tugs very gently on scarf to avoid choking* Can I have one too?/)w/)_

_ With hugs and Faygo (lol that motherfuckin stuff is the shit)_

_ The Theif Of Doom_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Mew,

I'M NOT HIPSTER! -Kanya and Rose in distance: Yes (Y)ou (A)re!-

Um...My position for moirail...is...reservved...*small blush*

I am vvery cool. -Karkat in distance: NO YOU ARE FUCKING NOT.-

Don't pull on that! Only if ya havve thirty boondollars.

No it's not,

Eridan Ampora

Prince of Hope


	24. Chapter 24 KageSempai 2

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Yo, Eridan.<em>

_I see that, -tips head to the side-_

_Ohonhonhon~ Nice~ When did these Red Feeling's start?_

_Aww -pinces cheeks- Your so cute when you blush like an Uke!_

_It's called a cat...Lol paww beast..._

_Aww! -pouts- Russia is sad now because he's all alone with no one to love_  
><em>him... RUSSIA I'M COMING!<em>

_I'm insane ^^_

_With Pancakes and Canadian syrup,_

_Kag~ =^J^= (Russia Cat PWN'S)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Hi Kag**,**

****Duh.

Wwell...wwhen wwe...wwere littler...*blush*

I AM NOT A BOTTOM! *knowws wwhat an Uke is from Nepeta*

Wwell, to me it's a paww beast.

...

Yes you are.

With veggies and cuttle fish,

Eridan Ampora =(u_u)= (My face pwwns more)


	25. Chapter 25 Kage sempai 3

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Yo, Eridan.<em>

_Now, now, no need to shove that five meter long stick deeped into your ass._

_Awww~ -French sounding- Ah Young Love... -blinks- I need to stop spending time_  
><em>with France...<em>

_-Blinks- So you want Sollux to Bottom?_

_Hmm...how many Eridan X Sollux has Sollux bottom...? Lol that sounded like a_  
><em>Riddle...<em>

_Ok ok~ -pats head-_

_-is suddenly holding a blood stained Pipe- Da, I am...Kolkolkol~_

_With Vodka and Blood,_

_Kag. (Sorry sweetie but nothin' can Pwn Russia!)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Hi Kag**,**

...Wwhat?

*blushes*

Yes! Uh, I mean... um..*hides face in pilloww*

...SHUT THE GLUB UP!

*swwats at hand* Leavve me alone crazy landwweller.

*eeps, and hides under bed* LEAVVE ME BE! I BEG YOU! -In a random place, AKA Sollux's bedroom. Sollux:*shivers*...Thomething'ths wrong...-

Typing from under my bed,

Eridan Ampora. (...-unknowingly uses Uke face-)


	26. Chapter 26 Kage sempai 4

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Yo, Erida~<em>

_...Lol._

_D'aww Cute~_

_But I don' wanna -pouts-_

_Excuse moi? I am now crazy!_

_Just come closer so I can beat your face in with my pipe~!_

_Aww~ Dont hide it only makes me Pleasure-smile because it mean's that I have_  
><em>to find you, like a game of cat and mouse, da?<em>

_Looking for you,_

_Kag. (Cute Uke face~!)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Kag**,**

No laugh!

I AM NOT CUTE.

Please...

I AM SURROUNDED BY CRAZIES.

...Eep...-suddenly Sollux busts through the door-

Sollux: LEAVE MY UKE THE FUCK ALONE. *sparkin wwith psionic energy*

Sol! My savvior!

Gack,

Eridan (..wwhat?)


	27. Chapter 27 RobinsArt 1

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Eridan,<em>

_So, I think you're my patron troll, cuz we're like, soulmates, but my friend,_  
><em>who is totally Tez, thinks I'm...Equius. <em>

_What do you think?_

_~Robin (The lonely quirky Harry potter and purple obsessed science goddess)_  
><em>Art<em>

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Dear Rob,

Um...Wwell, by wwhat I can tell, your patron wwould be your zodiac.

So...If..um...Aquarius is your zodiac, then I'm your patron...

So, I'm not sure...

From

Eridan Ampora


	28. Chapter 28 Kage Sempai 5

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Yo, Erida~! (Lol Uke version of your name ):D what now!)<em>

_ Yes, I do laugh~!_

_ Yes you are~!_

_ No -pouts-_

_ Yus you are!_

_ Aww Seme and Uke moment (takes out camera) Oh! no just ignore me and start with the smexy time!_

_ Watchin' your smexy time,_

_ Kag. (You had an Uke face! Do it again 0.0)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Kag,

NYEH.

AM NOOOT!

...Yes.

Nooooooooo!

Sollux:...What...The...Fuck.

...I don'y knoww Sol...I don't knoww...

GO AWWAY! *flails*

Eridan (...*cluless -uke- face*)


	29. Chapter 29 L4NDRULEZ900 5

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Hey Eridannnn~<em>

_Seriously. I'm thinking of making fish sticks tonight now. Hehehehe..._

_*pout* You're lying and I know it!_

_*starts fangirling* I bet it does! *eyes sparkle* _

_I just realized something super weird. Dave told it to me and...You know_  
><em>what...nevermind.<em>

_You'll love them! I just know it~! I actually got Equius to try them and he_  
><em>said they were 'exceptional' and all that crap! *whips out a batch of freshly<em>  
><em>baked brownies*<em>

_Okay byeeee~_

_Raven Nightcrest~_

_(By the way, I'm having anger issues soooo...don't come over. I'll be punching_  
><em>a wall if you need me~)<em>

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Hello Rav,

...Wwhat? -scared-

AM NOT!

Yes. Yes it is.*rubs chin trying be sexy*

...Wwhat did that lowwblood say? WWHAT DID HE SAY? -shakes-

...Hmm...-tries one- This...this is BEAUTIFUL. -Tears. All of them. They belong to you.-

Bye,

Eridan Ampora

(...o-oh. Okay.)


	30. Chapter 30 Kage Sempai 6

_NO OWN.  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>Yo, Erida~<em>

_You make weird sounds~_

_Yes._

_Nooooooooooooooooooooo! -pouts more-_

_Yes~~~~~~~_

_LOL_

_NEVER! ):D_

_Botherin' you,_

_Kag~ (D'aww so cute!)_

**BLUBBLUBBLUB**

Kag,

I do not!

Nooo.

*accidentally uses Uke eyes*

No.

GAAACK.

SOLLL PROTECT MEEEE!

Go awway,

Eridan (*hides face in pillow*)


End file.
